Set Yourself Free by Being Yourself with Your Kids
Set Yourself Free by Being Yourself with Your Kids
Authenticity is underrated. It’s more than being honest with the world. It’s about being honest with yourself and with your family. There are many advantages to being authentic. Most importantly, you’ll no longer feel the need to change your words and actions to impress others. You can relax and be yourself, especially at home.
Now, I’m not advocating telling your kids everything. After all, they’re still kids. But being your rational self, showing children your calm demeanor can give them confidence to be their own authentic self. Before you can be authentic, it’s important to know yourself. This includes your values and goals . Authenticity becomes possible when you know what’s important to you.
Embrace authenticity and present yourself honestly:
1) Give up the need to appear perfect.
Excellence is great by anyone’s standards. But seriously, when you don’t need to appear perfect, you’re in the position to be honest. Your kids need to see that they do not need perfection to please you or anyone else. No one can be perfect and honest at the same time. Avoid putting on a show for the rest of the world. You’ll only feel bad about yourself later. Your kids follow your example and they need to know that it’s a part of life to aim high and sometimes to fail and sometimes to change direction.
It’s okay to be less than spectacular. Be the best at being yourself.
2) Know your values and live by them.
If you know your values and live by them consistently, you’re already doing well in the authentic department.
Make a list of your values and determine the five that are most important to you. Are you living your life according to these values? Would it be obvious to others that you hold these values?
Decide to make your decisions based upon your values. Be willing to share your values with others. Now, show you kids how you make your decisions and teach them how to apply this to themselves.
3) Notice when you’re not being authentic.
It’s not easy to be authentic all the time. You might find yourself transforming based on the situation. A first date is a good example. Are you being authentic or pretending to be someone you’re not?
Take note of those times your authenticity starts to wane. Think about what you would rather be, would rather stand for. Practice being that authentic person. Helping your kids practice being good people is that same way you practice your values.
4) Know your goals.
What do you want out of life? Do you know? Are you willing to let others know? By knowing your goals, you can you live your life accordingly. Live you passion.
Make a list of your short-term and long-term goals. How well do they align with your values? Set your sites on your goals and your code of conduct. This is the way you want your children to succeed at in life.
5) What are your defining characteristics?
Describe yourself honestly. Now ask yourself if a casual acquaintance would describe you the same way? How about someone that knows you well? How about your closest friend?
How many people know you well? If there aren’t many, ask yourself why. If you’re living authentically, it should be easy for someone to develop an accurate opinion of you. What are your “negative” characteristics? Are you impatient or messy? Are you willing to allow others to see these characteristics or do you attempt to hide them? Knowing your weaknesses and acknowledging them helps you face your life’s work of improvement. Find ways to overcome weakness by enlisting help or hiring work done that you don’t do well yourself.
6) Tell the truth.
If you’re being authentic, why would you need to lie? This pertains especially to anything you say about yourself. Admit your mistakes, weaknesses, and frailties. Share your opinions honestly and freely. Your children are always watching. They’ll learn from you how to take responsibility for what they do and not blame others or circumstances.
7) Simplify your life.
Get rid of everything that’s extraneous. What you choose to keep will be representative of your preferences and your true self. Find your true essence by stripping away the non-essential. Start with the clothes you never wear, the things you never use, and the activities you don’t enjoy. Only keep the things that mean the most to you. Kids can sometimes get possessive with things. Show them that they not things are the most important to you.
8) Do what you say you’ll do.
Keep your word and follow through on your promises. You’ll feel more congruent, and others will view you as more congruent. When your words and actions match, you’re demonstrating authenticity.
Teach your kids the same.
Life becomes easier when you’re living authentically. You’ll no longer feel the exhaustion that comes with constantly changing your opinions, attitudes, and personality to please others. You’ll no longer feel the need to protect yourself from others . Be authentic with your thoughts, words, and actions. Invest the time in yourself and learn to be free. When you live free, you raise children who also feel free.
About the Author Angie J. Hernandez, C.Ht.
A graduate of the Hypnosis Motivation Institute, Angie J. Hernandez, C.Ht., has her private practice in Milford, Indiana. She is certified in hypnotherapy by the Hypnotherapist's Union Local 472. Angie is the author of "Weight Loss Epiphany: The Workbook", "Charlie's Cuddly Animals for Little Geniuses" and "Weight Loss Hypnosis: Lose Weight with Hypnosis Scripts & Recordings". You can find out more about Angie and how to schedule private sessions by calling (574) 658-4686.
